Arrogance isn’t only an emotion: it is a judgment label others place on you based on your perceived behavior. Arrogance is a behavioral trait with emotional involvement.

NT Experience

“I am above others; their standards do not apply to me.”

In NT people there are two things to consider:

• when do they act arrogant
• when do they label others as arrogant

The emotion behind acting arrogant is likely Pride but maybe in fact be based on Fear or Shame. In people with very high authority or power it may be an intentional signal that they are better than you – either intimidation or lack of care. For most people it is some kind of protective signal to bolster their ego when they are unsure.

Most NT people try to avoid looking arrogant. They will use softening phrases like “maybe we could” or “I could be wrong, but…”. They will also back up the words with vibe: they will adjust their tone, facial expression and body language.

NT people detect arrogance in the same way:

• blunt truth
• phrasing that is 100% certain
• flat tone
• direct eye contact
• body language

My Experience

I don’t experience arrogance, but NT people can easily perceive me to be so:

• I am very blunt
• I do use softening for when I am not 100% sure
• I have Flat Affect
• I have no Social Salience so I don’t mirror or give off proper vibes
• I think logically and speak logically – it can come off as cold

Per the LLM, NT people perceive this as:

“This person is speaking with total certainty and ignoring social rank; therefore, they must believe they are the highest-ranking person in the room.”

I have no notion or care of social strata – I don’t respect Authority, I respect competence. I don’t think I am better than anybody, that is just how I communicate.

I can adjust how I speak based on the perceived capacity of the receiver: I wouldn’t tell a child the same thing I would tell an adult, but I presume adults capable of handling truth even if inconvenient.

Note: I thought maybe I could have a script to sound less arrogant, but per the LLM:

NT people are hypersensitive to “Social Scripts” used without “Social Affect.” If they detect that your humility is a Calculated Utility rather than a Felt State, they may categorize you as “Manipulative” or “Psychopathic” (both are NT social constructs for “Someone using logic where I expect emotion”).

I don’t try to avoid appearing arrogant, but I do try to avoid social friction when I can.

My detection of arrogance is quite different too. I don’t see various indicators, I see output:

• abuse of power/position
• rule breaking
  • especially by people in positions of power

This is what defines arrogance to me.

Comparison

Although I suspect many people would find the same people arrogant as me (though maybe not – some people give rule exceptions for power), I think everything else about this concept is different. I can’t feel it but I look like I have it. I have little capacity to avoid it.

Semantic Divergence: yes.